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Blog

News and views from The Backbone Collective which advocates for women and children who have experienced violence or abuse and who are enduring further harm from New Zealand's Family Court. 

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Posts in Children
A mother's grief

TRUE STORY: Backbone regularly hears from women who are accused of being mentally unwell during Family Court proceedings when they raise genuine concerns for the safety of their children while in the care of the abuser. Sometimes these women are portrayed as ‘unfit mothers’ and lose custody of their children. Here, a victim-survivor writes about the horror and heartbreak of losing her children into the full-time care of her abuser.

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Invisible wounds - Psychological abuse cuts deep

TRUE STORY: One woman shares her experience of psychological abuse from her husband and the struggle she has faced to get safe. She reached out for help but no one believed her. She writes that friends, family, Police and those working in the Family Court do not understand psychological abuse and coercive control and the impact it has on victim-survivors. She hopes that more is done to improve the understanding of and response to psychological abuse so that other victim-survivors don’t go through what she has. She advocates that victim-survivors keep believing their own experiences are real and don’t give up demanding protection from abuse.

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From a Mother, to a Mother, for Mothers - An open letter to Prime Minister Jacinda Adern

TRUE STORY:A domestic violence survivor writes an open letter to Prime Minister Jacinda Adern to share her anguish about the way that Oranga Tamariki (New Zealand’s Statutory Care and Protection Agency) abuse, blame and devalue mothers who experience violence and abuse from a partner. She is calling for immediate system change that makes Oranga Tamariki 110% accountable for the way they work and intervene in the lives of whānau. She says “change needs to happen as swiftly as our children are removed. It's not OK! “

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TRUE STORY: THE FAMILY COURT MINIMISED THE ABUSE & DANGER AS HE WAS MY EX

TRUE STORY: A mother's fight to keep her child safe cost her $40,000 and exposed an unbelievable Family Court response that she blames in part for NZ’s terrible domestic violence statistics. She shares her story here to  show that the current Family Court system does NOT protect women and children after they leave violence. She is calling for a public outcry against women and children being mistreated in this way.

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Vagina Monologues benefit For Backbone TOMORROW

It is 20 years since Playwright Eve Ensler gave permission to artists to perform her play The Vagina Monologues. Tomorrow's benefit in Auckland on International Women's Day features a star cast, guest speakers MP Jan Logie and Dr Pani Farvid, and 'vagazelled' chocolates donated by Chocolatier Baron Hasselhoff. Organiser The Lady Corp. is donating the proceeds to The Backbone Collective.

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